March 15, 2005

Michael Jackson

It seems like everyone is talking about the Michael Jackson case. And by everyone, I mean absolutely know one. But it does appear to be on the news a lot (from what I can gather from channel surfing between ESPN and Mtv).

Whenever I write something I always have my readers in mind. So most of my writing is geared to the highly coveted male pederast demographic. What's up fellas?

I figure they want me to say something about the Michael Jackson case. The only thoughts I have on the case have to do with the sentencing. What the fuck is Michael going to do if he gets locked up?

I happen to have an unhealthy fascination with the penal system (wait did I just say "penal" hahahaha). I watched OZ for years (up until it got ridiculous), and every documentary, HBO or the Discovery channel produced on our great nations prison system.

My prediction is that Michael is going to join up with the Muslims. That is his best move. I believe they already do security for him so he has an in. Still he will not survive more than 2 years in prison. He will either have a complete mental breakdown, someone will punch him in his fucked up face and it will explode, or he will get shanked in the lunch line because Sanchez thinks Julio Iglesias is the "king of pop". Whatever happens I just hope they get it on tape.
I love me some prison violence.

Best Michael Jackson joke I have heard.

What is the difference between Michael Jackson and acne?
Acne won't come on your face till your 15

posted by John 7:51PM