June 12, 2005

Jesus, Jessica Alba, and Hunks

A lot of people come up to me and say "John I heard you have a website. You must get laid all the time, right?"

Of course I laugh in a aw shucks manner, and display all the socially required signs of modesty. Then my face turns serious and I look them dead in the eye. The unflappable honesty of my gaze freezing them where they stand while it draws them into my words. "Son, I get more ass than Jesus," I say. Then I walk away, leaving them to contemplate the implications of that revelation.

Jessica Alba is the most talented woman in Hollywood. I have not seen any of her movies yet, but that is not important. What is important is that she wore a see-through dress to the MTV VMAs. In honor of her great achievement I have put together the Best of Jessica Alba picture gallery. It is hot, I have good taste.

Do not worry ladies I did not forget about you! Well maybe I did, but then I remembered you! I thought it was about time you ladies had something to jerk it too. So, I searched the net and amassed a delectable collection of male eye candy. I call it the Wall of Hunks. Warning! These hunks are so hot you may bust a nut!

posted by John 1:32AM